You know what hurts?

I can have my heart ripped off, stamped on and shoved down my throat yet I'll still be there for that person if they needed me. Sitting there realising I really am the bad person sometimes. Even though I genuinely love with all of my heart, there's this piece of me that always ruins things and pushes people away.

I looked at my memory box few days ago and i saw a letter.. back in twenty twenty something...

I still love you and when they ask me about you, I smile because the memories we made were the most beautiful experiences of my life. It was so easy loving you and maybe when people ask you about me, you'll remember how perfect our love for each other truly was. It's true what they say thou, not all stories have a happy ending but we had a happy beginning and middle haha and for that, I am so grateful, grateful to have been loved by you. I hope someday, our paths crosses again and that time, i'll be damn sure to not let you go. until then, i need to do some work. yours truly

And. I was bawling my eyes out.. I always love romantic gesture. The old-school style of loving. I know for a fact that it is impossible for anyone to love me but I'm sure one day, someone will and I dont mind if that someone is... ME :) You know what hurts? No matter ow many times they hurt you, you still don't hate them because there was a time when they made you the most happiest person in the world. And i could never hate that person. I will always be warm, welcoming and accepting. I will always make sure that you're safe with me. You can let your guard down and be you. Cause I.. am hoping that one day, someone will do exactly that. for me..

i wish everyone understood that some days are harder than others, that some days it is really reallllyyyy hard to just move and get anything done. People need to understand that everyone is trying their hardest and some days we may struggle, we may fall and that is okay because at least... we are trying. People always talk about how much breakups suck but no one talks about how painful it is have to force yourself to move on when you are still so in love with them. Like.. You know things have not been the same in a long time and it is time to let go but, at the same time, it is like that was my person, that was my love, my whole world and now i'm supposed to let go of tem and become strangers again? how?

The last time i showed love, I had my heart broken and now I've learnt why I can never do it again. I gave the last person my all while he betrayed me.I was there but now i feel like no one is here for me.